Exciting News for The Harpers!

      We are having a baby BOY!!!  We are due December 13th. Such great news. You could stop reading there unless you want to hear all the inner ramblings of my thoughts on this pregnancy number four.
      Right after we got home from California, I started thinking that I might be pregnant, sure enough my feelings were confirmed with a positive test. I Remember telling Nolan and we were both so surprised. The plan was to wait a few years and get pregnant and then have another one really close. In so many ways, Emma still seems like a baby! I know that by the time this baby comes she will be older, but I hope I can really tell enjoy her young toddler years and Not expect her to grow up too fast. Also I was worried for what other people would think! Not only that we were crazy having them close but that we were even having another. I really feel like everyone is done having kids at three these days. A lot of my friends and most of our ward families only have 3 kids. I know My real friends and people who care about me would not feel this way, but I couldn't help but be at the grocery store and see a mom with four young kids in tow and think to myself, "I don't want to be that lady!" Pretty hypocritical of me I know.

      I am realizing that no matter how hard we plan, things will happen when Heavenly Father wants them to happen. The more time I have had to think about this pregnancy the more I excited I get for it. I have always wanted a big family like mine Nolan's, and I really do feel in control of my day today life and know that I won't be overwhelmed with another right now. Fingers crossed we get another good eater and sleeper like Grace was! I think it is pretty cool that my four kids will be so close in age, and in a few years we will be able to all go on trips together without leaving a baby behind. I am not saying that this is my last, but I'm going into this Pregnancy thinking it could be so I am not disappeared if in a few years I realize it was my last. The hardest thing to think about is being only 28 and having my last kid. I will be 46 when this one graduate. I have never desired to go back to work, and living in Malta it's not exactly the social scene of the world. So I am afraid of what I will do for 15 years while Nolan still works on the farm, and all my kids have gratuated! I have always wanted a baby when I was older, like 38, so that I would be older when they do leave the house. But unless I plan on having a huge gap or 10 kids, I may just be alone for a bit. 

     Because this pregnancy is so close to Emma, I waited a lot longer to release the news than I ever have with any pregnancy. It actually has been really fun this way keeping it a secret. I think it helped me feel better during the first trimester because I had to stay busy and fake feeling well, when all I wanted to do was go to sleep! I felt like it was a boy all along because I was not showing for a while, and feeling much better than I did when pregnant with my girls. 2 weeks ago I had my ultrasound and was right in my guess. People have reacted so fun too. They are always shocked to hear I am pregnant, and even more surprised when I tell them I'm 20 weeks along and having a boy! This pregnancy has gone faster than my first 3 for sure. The kids are really excited and for the most part I have felt really good

     I think the greatest tender mercy has been that While I thought I would be the only one having a baby out of my friends and family, both of my sisters also are having babies very close to this one, quite a few people around the area, who have kids close to my others in age, and two of my dear friends from Smithfield are having their fourth as well! Being pregnant and raising babies is way more fun when others are around you are and can relate and empathize with you.
  And there are my ramblings. This will be a year to remember as we are so busy building our house, and getting ready for a fourth child! Once again I wish I could freeze time, and cherish each moment. Life doesn't slow down!